Men are More Romantic than Women
Ahh, Valentine’s Day, aka Singles’ Awareness Day. Obligatory love-related article follows…
I was reading a book a few years ago entitled How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You by Leil Lowndes (1996), half out of curiousity, half out of quiet desperation. Anyways… one of the most interesting excerpts I found was this:
A Quiz: Who Loves More, Men or Women?
Men suffer a bad rap for being less romantic than women. Naturally, if you do a survey of men or women at the mall asking “Who’s more romantic?” the majority will say women. At first glance, the evidence is pretty overwhelming that women are the romantics. Indeed, they are when it comes to saying “I love you,” remembering Valentine’s Day, and knowing “it’s the little things that count” (like an engagement ring). But when it comes to the truly deep and important definition of romance, you men are the big winners.
At some point in your life, gentlemen, the woman of your dreams will probably say accusingly (in response to one of your everyday “insensitive” remarks) that “you men are all alike! You’re so unromantic!” My gift to you is the following. Someday it will come in handy, in self-defense. I’ve packaged it neatly in the form of a quiz that you can give her when she calls you unromantic.
Who really is capable of loving more, men or women?
| QUESTIONS | MEN | WOMEN |
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| Who falls in love faster? Who is more idealistic about love? Who usually initiates the breakup? Who suffers more from a breakup? Who loves their lovers more? |
__ __ __ __ __ |
__ __ __ __ __ |
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Who Falls In Love Faster? Men!
In one study, seven hundred young lovers were asked, “How early did you realize you were in love?” Men fell in love faster. Before the fourth date, 20 percent of men had taken the tumble, whereas only 15 percent of the women realized Cupid had stung them; 43 percent of the women still didn’t know they were in love by the twentieth date, compared to only 30 percent of the men.
Women are more cautious about getting involved.
Who Is More Idealistic About Love? Men!
Another study determined that men had a far more idealistic and less practical view of love. Men were not nearly as concerned with a woman’s social position or how much money she made.
More men felt that as long as two people truly love each other, they should have no trouble getting along in marriage.
Who Usually Initiates the Breakup? Women!
A group of Harvard scientists vigilantly followed the affairs of 231 Boston couples. Of those who split up, usually it was the woman who suggested the separation. The men wanted to stick it out to the bitter end.
Who Suffers More From a Breakup? Men!
The men felt lonelier, more depressed, unloved, and least free after a split. The men reported that they found it extremely hard to accept that they were no longer loved and that she had really gone. What disturbed them most was that they felt there was nothing they could do about it. They were plagued with the hope that if only they had said the right thing… done the right thing….
In fact, three times as many men commit suicide after a disastrous love affair as women do.
Who Loves Their Lovers More? Men!
Men love their lovers more in relation to others in their life. Several researchers at Yale University polled male and female participants from age 18 to 70 and asked, “Who do you like, and who do you love, most in your life?” The choices were lover (or spouse), best friend, parents, and siblings.
Men, it turned out, loved and liked their lovers more than their best friends, whereas, with women, the rankings were about equal. Many women liked their best friends more than they liked their lovers!
Gentlemen, the next time your lover complains, “You men are so unromantic,” just show her these statistics and say, “Yeah, who says? Huh, huh, huh?” (On second thought, just say, “You know, dear, you have a good point. I’m sorry. I’ll try to be more romantic. I love you.”)
Check out last year’s more cynical Valentine’s Day posts:
Oh, and also, it’s only one month to go until Steak and BJ Day!
Anonymous said,
February 14, 2006 at 8:01 pm
what the hell is with that new apple add with intel is it true the vidoe parts of that add were taken from a song clip and that the song makers cant sue cuz apple will take them of itunes
Chaff said,
February 14, 2006 at 8:22 pm
I really can’t tell what the hell you are talking about there Anon, but you sure seem passionate about it, too bad it has nothing to do with the article.
Nice work on the article Doc, some fantastic ideas for fighting with signifigant others… or not.
Chaff said,
February 15, 2006 at 12:21 am
As sort of a follow up to the post from last year, here are a couple more Satan themed V-day anagrams:
Even Satan Idly (guess who didn’t get a date…)
Satan Devil Yen (I knew we coudn’t trust Japanese currency, it has let it’s creators down for the last time!)
Satan Deli Envy (ahh… maybe he wants a sandwich…?)
Maddy said,
February 16, 2006 at 9:06 am
I agree with that. Guys are more romantic and what’s more is they put up with women telling them otherwise. Guys go to all this effort to put something special together on Valentine’s Day while year after year women expect to be showered in exorbent gifts. What with birthdays, anniversaries, christmas, mother’s day (if you’re married) and goodness knows what other occasions, its a real strain on a guy’s pocket. Personally, I prefer a gesture with sentimental value that comes from the heart.
johnsee said,
February 16, 2006 at 10:35 am
“It’s a real strain on a guy’s pocket”
You can say that again!
Maddy said,
February 17, 2006 at 8:58 am
…It’s a real strain on a guy’s pocket…
HTNet said,
February 27, 2006 at 11:11 am
Men Are More Romantic Than Women
Men has always been victims of accusations such as;
“You’re so unromantic!”
“You don’t really love me, do you?!”
“I bet you’ll be on the rebound as soon as we break up!”
Well, Sandstorming….
Leil Lowndes said,
May 3, 2006 at 3:46 am
Hi folks, I’m happy that you found my quiz from “How to Make Anyone Fall in Love With You.” it’s all true — you poor guys are on such a bad rap for being unromantic. NOT TRUE. You’re a lot more loving in many ways, just not the superficial ones.
I’m writing more about this in my new book coming out in August, “Undercover Sex Signals.” It’s written for guys on how to tell if a woman likes you.
Enjoy!
Leil Lowndes
cuteangel said,
May 11, 2006 at 2:00 pm
hey maddi i toatally feel what ur saying my boyfreind is so sweet but so many dam girls around him
Jillian said,
July 8, 2006 at 12:38 am
i fine men are very hard to please. i am in a relationship and i does everything. when his birthday comes around all i do is by roes and light candle. i do everything to make feel special and a i get is happy birthday. i love that guy but i will have to move on because he dont know how to be romantic, even how to treat a woman.
Doc said,
July 15, 2006 at 2:13 pm
Well there’s your problem. Don’t treat him the way you want to be treated. The golden rule doesn’t apply to dating.
Men are easy to please. Just stop thinking like a woman. A guy does NOT want roses and candles for his birthday. Seriously, WTF.
A simple grasp of the english language might also help your relationship woes.
vale said,
October 5, 2006 at 8:02 am
the women of my dreams..is a bitch or is a dream?
jolie said,
January 15, 2007 at 5:16 am
If thats true and men are romantic when granted the opportunity why don’t take time to embrace the person in their life rather than neglecting there needs and being absent minded about specific things that are important to that individual.
Regrets are useless if you haven’t learned your lessons obviously you have lots to learn
and furthermore.Men deserve it you spent countless hours with the girlfriend spending time with her and shes already told you what she needed in the relationship.
And you fail at it then you deserve to be alone as a male or go back to school and learn about women obviously if you cant understand us you will never comprehend the human
mind.
Thats how I see it and theres no point ending your life just because of it, life goes on and I as female could care less if you leaped off the highest building and plundered to
tragic mess.
Realistically speaking just maybe you never really cued into what your mate really needs and now finally you realize what you need to do in your next relationship.
gibson said,
August 8, 2007 at 11:48 pm
woman are more romantic than men
Alicia said,
September 22, 2007 at 7:26 am
Interesting stats. I know I’ve read these somewhere before. As I have gotten older, I have definitely noticed some things that, perhaps, are all too often overlooked. For example… my husband isn’t the most romantic with holidays, but he cooks me fantastic dinners almost every night. He brings me coffee in bed in the mornings, tells me I’m beautiful, even when I’m sick and I’ve gained weight. I think women tend to spend too much time looking at those things we (women) consider romantic… and not enough time looking at the romantic things that they do on an everyday basis.
Tiphany said,
September 28, 2007 at 11:12 am
I think men are more romantic in public then women. Most women shy away when a man is over romatic in public. In the bedroom women are more romantic because we have the freedom and the privacy too do what we please with our men.
Amanda said,
November 11, 2007 at 5:01 pm
I think men are more romantic than women. Many women get or are so caught up in the day to day mundain caring things that need to be done (often times men do not do these things, the cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, etc.) but many men spend the time to really plan a romantic occasion or something special. In my last relationship we spent $ equally, but I spent it on many, many smaller surprises through out where as he would do much larger surprises. I would do the day to day special things to make a difference & he would do the larger, more extravagent suprises. Both ways are great, however in our case it was ended before we realized that he wanted me to do more of the larger suprises & I wish he would do more of the day to day things. That unfortunately is a learning lesson for me that I wish I could apply back to that relationship. I guess I was so busy doing the day to day things to care for him that I didn’t take the time to reflect & realize what he really wanted, which was what he would do for me, the grander suprises. I will be lucky to find someone again who was as romantic as him. He is an outstanding individual that truely knows how to be romantic!
MISSmurder said,
November 15, 2007 at 10:37 am
Yeah right, i’m the only romantic one in my relationship. I do all the cute love dovey stuff. I put up with all the crap he gives me, and never say a word. I’d say statistics are completely wrong.
sh said,
November 26, 2007 at 8:37 pm
hi doctor!
i am a girl from iran that wanna to suiside/no please dont wrong/i am not in a relationship with a men/but i am so sad because of being girl/i think that girls are weaker in any thing/in physical/in mental/in love /anyway/i wanna to suiside /why girls are so feelings and why they do everything for a man/why?please help me
A girl said,
February 16, 2008 at 6:12 am
This statistic is very interesting to me. As a girl, I’ve experienced heart-brreaking feeling after a break-up and I felt like my ex would rebound right away and I felt like I was so much in love more than him, and It was hard for me to move on, However, we both are now missing each other, and I do believe men are more caring inside their heart even though they don’t express much. This feeling from making an effort to empathize with men is so great! -from Korea
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PhilLaj said,
March 25, 2008 at 10:17 am
This is totally right in every way, it’s sad to be a man and may never be loved has much has I love
luisana said,
May 15, 2008 at 3:40 am
Em, I completely disagree with these statistics. It’s easy for me to be “romantic” like 4 times a year, and what about the other days? They don’t put up with much more than what a woman has to put up. When it comes to love, us women tend to be more naive and blinded about it, men always want to grab ONE thing and we all know what THAT is. Women are the ones who fantasize about romance while men have that “?” on their face. WRONG!
Tom said,
May 19, 2008 at 8:09 am
So you think men are only interested in one thing, ie. S.E.X.?
Well, I think most men are interested in that just the same as most women are too.
But if you are suggesting that men don’t seek intimacy, affection, companionship, etc then you are deeply mistaken.
Saying that men are only interested in getting you into bed is a generalisation in the same way that saying women are only interested in your bank account.
Yes, I’m sure most of them do have a passing interest in that if they are honest.
But it’s not like that’s all that’s on their minds……is it? ;-)
jim said,
July 5, 2008 at 9:36 am
ever since i fell for my wife i,v never looked or touched another woman
its also a matter of timeing theres times my wife was ready other times me though with five kids our personal life suffered
to late we relised its not wrong to put ourself first sometimes as good parents
we allways put kids first now we,v been seperated for two years you ask are men romantic as a soilder whose been to battlie in iraq 2003 we can handle most things but we need a good partner even men need to talk there are things only soilders partners now i truley love my wife but its no good one way
DONT TAKE YOUR PARTNER FOR GRANTAGE